CHANGSHA

After a cramped flight... but a delicious lunch... we arrived in Changsha. AHHHH!!!!! We're HERE!!! We're gonna get our babies! We're gonna get our babies! One of the other Mommies and I jump up and down. It's really gonna happen! Here we are! Sometimes dreams do come true! Another quick prayer that everything run smoothly and we're off!

Our next CTS guide is called "Lisa". She tells us where she is from and then starts to sing to us. She sings an old folk song and it's so sweet. She sings to us many times in the next few days, but is really surprised that we would rather hear Chinese folk songs than our American songs. Looking back, I'll bet she practiced those American songs for hours. We should have let her sing as many as she wanted to. We just wanted to hear more of the music of our children's homeland. Luckily, she was nice enough to accommodate us.

She told us we would stop at our hotel to drop our luggage and freshen up, but we had someplace to be quickly, so we had to hurry. We saw lots of construction all through the city of Changsha. We slowed and stopped in front of a large hotel with construction all around it. The hotel was called the Hua Tien. The front entrance had a huge foyer and you could see the restaurant straight ahead. We checked in and prepared for the worst. We had gotten reports from other parents that the hotels in Changsha were dirty and noisy. They must not have stayed at the Hua Tien. It was very clean and we didn't hear any construction noise at all during the night. The room was small by American standards, but they managed to get two beds and a cot for Sara in there. They were going to try to fit a crib, too but there wasn't much room left, so we put the two chairs together (they had REALLY high sides) and I put down the panda quilt I had brought in Beijing and the baby blanket I had brought from home to fit on top. Wow! Her first crib! Soon our baby would be in there. WOW!

First place Lisa took us was the Notary's office. OK, here we go. Our first paperwork to get our munchkins. They took us in, two couples at a time. The Rays and Morrisons sitting still and trying not to get too excited. Yeah. Right. AHH!!! I don't even remember what papers I filled out. It's all a blur. Mothra was working overtime fluttering around in my tummy. I tried so hard not to laugh. Not to cry. Not to stand up and run screaming from the office. I remember Steve talking and signing our names and we swore never to abandon or harm our precious baby. They shook our hands and gave us the baby's passport. I think. It was the baby's picture and a bunch of Chinese writing all in a brown leather case. Is she ours yet? No not yet. That's tomorrow.

We waited in the hall while the other couples were filling out their paperwork. There was a little gift shop and a fruit shop right there at the end of the hall. So, of course, I went shopping! Bought Sara some "Fisherman's Friend" for her cold and a really small umbrella. Then I checked out the fruit stand. I had never seen such huge fruit in all my life! There was one Asian pear that would have taken both hands to hold! It was amazing.

Then Lisa took us to the Hunan Embroidery Factory. I've read so many places that the Embroidery from Hunan is among the world's finest. We are so lucky to see it for ourselves. All these women wrapped up in their coats, busily stitching away. This stuff is incredible! I've been embroidering since I was seven, I really love it. These women were stitching was so uniformly. I was so envious at the evenness of each stitch. It was so beautiful. There were lots of heads of Mao Tse Tung, but one woman was stitching a picture of a huge lion. Another woman was stitching a maiden washing her hair in a lagoon. It was so green and peaceful.

The most incredible embroidery they do is the double-sided embroidery. One side of the fabric is a tiger stalking, flip it over and it's a kitten playing with a butterfly. You can't see any stitches from the other side! It is so amazing! I wish we could have afforded to buy a piece of embroidery like that, but we couldn't. We wound up buying some handkerchiefs and a huge tapestry. It is some large chrysanthemums with two birds flying alongside. We were told that the two birds means "Happy Marriage." We are going to have it mounted and hang it in our dining room. Once Aurora gets married, we'll give it to her for a wedding present.

When we finally got back to the hotel, I was ready for a night of construction noise. That's what I had been warned I would be listening to all night. That couldn't be further from the truth. As a matter of fact, the only noise we heard the first night was at about two in the morning I heard some kind of grunting and quick yells. I thought I was dreaming about a karate movie or something. I looked out the window and there was a very young man... a guard? doorman? who knows? anyway, some guy in a uniform of some sort was walking behind the hotel and practicing what looked like karate kicks in the back alley as he was walking. It was so cool! I guess boys will be boys the whole world over. Another guy in the same long coated uniform joined him and I guess told him to knock it off, because he stopped right away and soon they were laughing and talking softly. I found myself chuckling. These guys were just like the Marines back home (I live near Quantico.) So stern, strict and unemotional when you see them at their jobs, but catch them in an unguarded moment, and they're just people. It made me kinda homesick.

Friday, January 17th This is it! The day we get our baby! I wake up crying. I'm so nervous. When I'm nervous I do one of two things, cry or snap at everyone. Crying is better, but less acceptable in public. I really wish I was one of those people who can keep quiet, shyly observing and taking it all in. I was born with a big mouth and I talk people to death. So poor Papa wakes up and hears me crying, and the next thing I know I'm wrapped up in a big bear hug. Sara pops up and we're in a big group hug. We say another (the zillionth) prayer and rush around to get dressed.

It's a cold, wet, rainy day... but nothing can dampen our spirits. We ride the bus in nervous silence, everyone lost in thought. Snippets of conversation tumble out here and there, but for the most part we are all imagining what lies ahead. The drive rolls on and on past rice paddy after soggy rice paddy. Out the windows, we see bicycles everywhere... as per the norm... but now most of them are hooked up to carts. Carts carrying bags of grain, bags of who knows what, and one goes by loaded down with tires! How does he peddle that thing? Aren't tires heavy? Hey! There's a guy walking a water buffalo! Too cool! What? I don't believe it... a house!!! I had started to believe no one in China owned a house. Beijing and Changsha seem to be made up of apartment buildings, shops, schools and hotels. This is the first time I've seen a house. And the houses are big! Wow! Now we roll past a little town. Most of the buildings are two stories and it looks like garages with rooms on top. Each "garage door" is open and you can see inside are little shops and lots of restaurants. Women are huddled under blankets sitting on what looks like tables, waiting for customers. Lisa tells us that these are sort of like "bed and breakfasts" for the truckers that drive past all day. The truckers can have a meal, go upstairs and catch some rest and get back on the road. I'm babbling about nothing. I just babble on and on. I'm so nervous!!!

Now, I have to take a moment to discuss the driving in China. I have heard the ride to YiYang described many times as comparable to "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" at Disneyland. Although it may appear that way on the surface... our bus honks, swerves into the left lane of the two lane road, he honks twice, and passes the car in front of us, barely getting out of the way of the oncoming truck! It scared me at first, but after watching this a few times, I realized the Chinese do something I've never seen Americans do. They actually have no problem letting people pass and ACTUALLY SLOW DOWN TO LET THE PASSING CAR IN!!! I remember as a kid studying for her driver's test, I read that whenever you want to pass someone, you should always toot your horn twice and then pass. I remember so well because my only thought was that the only thing tooting your horn would get you is "the finger". Not so in China. Two toots and the guy slows down. Just like he's supposed to. Amazing!

We pass over a river and there it is... YiYang! We're here. Don't cry, Laura. Hold it together... The bus pulls up in front of a building. Is this it? We're led down some halls and up some stairs... This is awfully clean. Didn't they just have a terrible flood six months ago? I expected to see mud damage, but I see no trace inside the orphanage. Now we are led into a cold conference room. LOTS of chairs, an oblong table with two tall plastic rose bushes in the middle, and the bushes are wrapped in plastic wrap. There's a small pot like thing on the floor burning coal, I think. That's supposed to heat this whole room? I don't think it's gonna work! It's so cold we can see our breath. Lisa tells us that every building south of the Yangtze does not have central heat... except the hotels. I'm frozen to the bone!

We nervously pace, trying to peek out the door, but Lisa stands there... daring us to look. We hear babies crying, laughing, cooing, talking. We all want to rush out into the hall and love them all, but we stay... pacing and peeking out the windows. We look down and people are scurrying through the rain. Oh, there's the signs of the flood. Some buildings have stains from the mud. Some of the staining looks two stories high! My Goodness! That must have been some flood!

We sit down and count out our money. Getting it ready to hand over. We have been told to let the men do the talking and our facilitator laughs with me... knowing how hard it will be for me to keep my mouth shut. I don't think this is a hard and fast rule, just something the Chinese prefer. What the heck. I can shut up for an hour. I hope.

Pictures cover bulletin boards all across one wall. It's pictures of little children adopted from this orphanage. Lisa explains that parents send updated photos all the time. I recognize some of the parents in the photos! The apc list has really made this such a small world!

A wonderful young lady comes into the room with hot water. She makes us all a delicious green tea, which we sip slowly... enjoying the warmth. The first official walks in. He's wearing a leather coat with a fur collar. It seems half of China has this same style coat, it looks warm. He's all smiles. He has a kind face and happy eyes. We fill out paperwork. Another official walks in. He's skinnier, younger, and smells of tobacco. He goes in the corner and appears to be putting together some paperwork.

The first official interviews each family in turn. Why do you want to adopt this child? Why China? Do you promise never to abuse or abandon the child? Our facilitator translates for us while the official writes everything down. One by one each family hears, "Congratulations" and the official shakes their hands. We're last. Sara tapes us. I don't say anything. Let Steve do all the talking. First time I shut up in our entire life together. Steve secretly thinks, "Too bad I can't get this guy to go home with us..."

The other official comes over and hands out stacks of papers. We're told to look through them and check them for accuracy. The first one has our name and it says the orphanage gives permission for us to adopt Yi, Xin Ping. The second one says that she was abandoned at one week of age at the gate to the orphanage. The third says that we accept Yi, Xin Ping in adoption. We see that all the papers have all the names spelled correctly. We sign her official adoption certificate. We give one set of the papers back to the officials and we keep two sets. One set for INS and one set for us to keep. The officials smile and wave and leave.

Next, some women come in and tell us to turn off the recorders and the cameras. We give our donations, they give us more paperwork.

They leave and the excitement builds. In comes two young ladies, they look like secretaries... carrying two babies. The first man gets his baby (his wife didn't travel with him) and his face lights up. The baby looks at him with curiosity and he's fallen HARD for this little one. They drift off into their own world and get to know each other. The next baby is handed to a couple from Tennessee. The mom is ready to pop with excitement and the dad is beaming. She's so tiny, but beautiful. Both parents look like they are trying so hard not to cry. We wait...

Another "secretary" comes in. The next baby is brought to the couple from Indiana. They both squeal with excitement and it looks like the mom is trying hard to keep from jumping up and down. It's a wonder their faces didn't break from the HUGE smiles on both their faces. They are so happy...

At last, in comes another "secretary" holding a stiff pink form. "Yi, Xin Ping?" She says. I squeak and rush to grab the baby. She is so covered in clothes she can barely move, her arms are stiffly out at her sides. She has the biggest, pinkest cheeks I've ever seen! Her eyes are startlingly clear and intelligent. She takes it all in and I can barely breathe. I want to cry. I want to faint. I want to scream with excitement. She's HERE! In my arms at last!!! My baby Aurora!!!!!

Aurora is "checking us out". She stares right into my eyes. Trying to figure me out. I pull back the snow suit he's in so I can see her tiny hands. She reaches out and touches my nose. I talk to her and hug her and she thinks I've gone insane. Who IS this woman shoving my face into her hair and whispering in my ear?

Sara comes up and talks to her. Sara wants to hold her. I give the baby to Sara and Aurora reaches out and touches Sara's hair. Sara's hair is thick and wavy... not at all the thin stringy mess I was blessed with. Aurora must like my hair better. With one touch of Sara's hair she screams blue sixty! Sara panics and shoves the baby back at me.

I hug and hold and croon. Nothing works. Steve is practically leaping, he's so excited. I hand Aurora to Steve. Steve kisses her cheek and I snap a photo. Aurora reaches out a tentative hand... touches Steve's beard. And WAILS to the top of her lungs!!!!

Now everyone is in line to talk to the Chief of the Infant Division. She is a very petite, friendly, happy looking woman. She is very patient with all of us, and cheerfully answers our questions. I'm the last in line (still trying to calm Aurora) and finally get to ask my questions.

I asked, "She seems so much stronger and healthier than the others. Is there anything I should know about her?"

"Yes, she always wants to be held and loves to sleep and eat. She REALLY loves to eat!"

I looked down at my rather large frame and said, "AHA! My FAMILY!"

Everyone laughed.

Lisa asked if we would like to go to Changsha for lunch or eat in YiYang? We unanimously voted for YiYang. We all wanted to see a little more of our daughters' hometown. Lisa looked at us as if we were crazy.

She took us across the street to what looked like someone's garage. It was one of those garage style restaurants we had seen on the ride up! The garage door was down, and we went through a door cut into the front.

Immediately my eyes were drawn to the jars of snakes sitting on the counter. Beautiful colors, lots of different kinds... all soaking in some sort of liquid. I wish I was adventurous enough to try one, but I'm not. Too bad Steve's dad isn't here. I know he'd eat one. That man just LOVES to try anything new. But my Western prejudism against snakes, all I could think of was, "EEEEEEWWWWWWW!" and try to calm my stomach.

There were a few large round tables and we all sat around the empty one by the windows of the garage. We were all cold and hungry. The food looked delicious. Everyone said it was delicious. I wouldn't know. Aurora cried nonstop the whole time! I tried walking with her. I tried feeding her. I tried rocking her the American way and the Chinese way. I tried patting her back. I tried distracting her. NOTHING would calm this kid down! I was an evil woman come to take her away from all she knew and she wanted no part of it!

All the other babies contentedly watched their new parents eat.

Suddenly, I noticed a face through the window. An old man was peeking in at us and checking us out. He smiled and waved. That actually almost calmed down Aurora. For a moment... Next thing I knew, dozens of faces were pressed to the glass. Everyone was smiling and waving.

It was time for us all to get back on the bus and head for the hotel. We walked out of the restaurant into a sea of people. Everyone asked if we had adopted the babies. When we said yes, they all patted the babies on the backs and said "Lucky Baby! Lucky Baby!" We saw the "thumbs up" sign everywhere. We really felt overwhelmed and loved. It was wonderful!

The ride back to Changsha was long, cold, and mostly unremembered. All we parents were busily falling in love with our little ones. One of us mentioned how much Dennis' baby looked like him. He happily removed his glasses and put them on Emily for us all to see. She looked JUST LIKE HIM!!! What a sweet, beautiful child. Emily turned out to be just like her dad... quiet, but a great sense of humor. It just really lit up your heart to see her flash her Dad a big toothless grin.

Justin (yes, I know it's usually a boy's name, but I guess her parents wanted something unusual) was bouncing up and down on her Mommy's legs and doing a little dance for all of us. Her dad pulled back her hood to show us Justin's crazy hairdo... she had a Mohawk!!! All this long hair down the center of her head and nothing on the sides. She was the most active of the group. Always moving, always shaking and rattling toys... just a girl on the go!

Abigail was a tiny slip of a child. She was incredibly small and thin. She had big, soulful eyes and long piano-player's fingers. She was very quiet and still. She spent most of her time sucking her two middle fingers. We all worried about the little "Peanut," but she turned out all right... but for this trip on the bus, we worried. She and her Dad fell into an exhausted sleep while her Mom gently stroked her.

Aurora was still crying when we got on the bus, but slowly calmed down and fell to sleep. Once she was sleeping, Sara and Steve took turns passing her back and forth and just enjoying holding her.

We got back to the hotel, stripped off her clothes. She was presented to us in a bright pink and white, fuzzy snowsuit. Under that was a white snowsuit with little bear's ears lined in red and a little white bear's tail. Appliqued to the front is a little red giraffe with a yellow yarn mane and a braided yellow yarn tail. Under that was a hand-made, lined so it was reversible, red shirt with big black buttons, a pair of red sweat pants, and white socks. Under that was a hand-made red shirt with string ties instead of buttons! She also was wearing very thick, white knit stockings. She was also wearing Pampers! (Abigail's parents took a picture of all the clothes Abby was wearing. Here, take a look!)

We checked over the kid and took stock of what we had to deal with. She had a few sores on her head, one was infected. She had REALLY bad cradle cap and most of it was concentrated over the infected sore. She had a light rash from head to toe and VERY chapped cheeks. Her right leg was much thinner than her left and it bent out at a strange angle. We checked for Mongolian spots and all she had was what looked like pale bruises at the top of the crack of her buttocks and some pale bruising on her lower back. She also had some bruises on her sides and tummy. Well, they looked like bruises... I didn't know what they were. (But a year later, she still has them, so I guess they're birth marks of some sort.) We gave her a sponge bath, put Eucerin lotion all over her and Westcort Cream on her chapped cheeks (because she was scratching at them.) We put triple antibiotic ointment on the sores on her head and then checked over the leg. It looked pretty weird, but didn't seem to give her much pain, so we put her in some comfortable clothes.

Steve tried to get to know her a bit and tried to play and cuddle with her on the bed. He kept talking to her, smiling at her, hugging her, tickling her... but she gave the classic "overstimulated" pose.

We put the kids down for a nap, and Abby's parents came over to compare notes. We had all been told that as soon as we changed the children, we had to give the clothes back to our guide and she would return them to the orphanage. Emily's and Justin's parents, I believe, gave back the clothes. But Abby's folks and Steve & I all said, "NO WAY!" These were the only ties these kids had to their time in the orphanage and we just couldn't give them away. (I have them at home, lovingly tucked away in a trunk, for Aurora to have when she's older.) Steve and Abby's Dad went off to the Friendship Store to buy more clothes to give the orphanage.

They came back with snow suits, sweatsuits, sleepers, tee shirts, socks, blankets, anything warm they could find... and they bought LOTS of it. They wanted to be sure the orphanage got back much more than they gave, so there would be no problem.

Sure enough, Lisa came knocking at our doors for the clothes. We told her we wouldn't give them back. She got a bit upset and said we MUST return them. We gave her the four department store bags worth of clothes. She said that wasn't what they wanted, they wanted the clothes they presented our babies in. We told her that we were sorry, we just couldn't part with them. These were our daughter's ties to their past. I don't think she understood why we wanted them so badly, because she wasn't very happy with us. But we did finally convince her to take the new clothes, because there was absolutely no way she was getting our daughter's clothes from us.

After that excitement, we got ready for dinner. The babies were starting to be a little more comfortable and looked around while we ate. Even Aurora stopped crying and seemed to enjoy herself a bit. She made note every time my chopsticks went toward my mouth and she started doing this little bird imitation. The mouth was justa working! So, I gave her a little rice. She actually perked up! Smiles all around and more mouth opening and closing! I found the secret! Feed her and she's happy. I gave her a little soup broth and she acted like it was the greatest thing she'd ever had in her mouth. When I reached for my tea, I thought she was going to come unglued. She kept bobbing up and down and reaching for it. So I gave her a little tea. WOW!!! A full-faced grin!!!!! Hooray!!! (To this day, just seeing me pour the water for oolong or green tea gets her so excited, she starts hopping up and down!)

Aurora and Justin seemed to really hit it off and enjoyed "talking" to each other. Emily kinda looked around and then went to sleep. Abigail zonked out almost the minute she got to the table. We ate in happy bliss. We had our babies in our arms and all was right with the world.

That night, Aurora started crying the second the lights went out. I gave her one of the red shirts to sleep with and she kept rubbing it over and over and over her face. She also started clawing at her face like it itched alot. I finally put socks over her hands so she would stop scratching herself. She wasn't too happy with me. We didn't get much sleep, but who cared? We were a family!

Next morning, Lisa took us all to the Yuelu Academy of Classical Learning. It was one of the four famous academies of classical learning in ancient China. Confucian philosophers used to give lectures there! Now it's full of students, artists, and tourists. The place is really quite beautiful. The rooftops are intricately carved and each room holds something new to explore. There are small buildings and a pond out back.

The little pond was so tranquil and beautiful. Sara sat on a stone chair to rest. She said it made her behind a little cold, but it was worth the rest it gave her feet. Lots of children were running all around, but two little girls caught my eye. They were lazing along a banister, swinging their legs and pretending to be two tigers in a tree.